Today’s Tipful Tuesday is brought to you from a frustrated place in my heart. It always seems so simple doesn’t it? To tell someone how to do things, offer your quick advice, and in a quite demanding way think you’re right… because after all that’s how it worked for you. Today’s tip is just that simple also, only offer your advice where your advice is warranted. Being a new mom, a first time mom, and a tired mom, it seems that everyone has reasons why I shouldn’t do this or shouldn’t do that. If you would listen to me a little closer, you would understand why some of the decisions are made the way I make them. It just so happens that I also have done my research and I decide to do certain things because I think it is good and beneficial to my child. Nothing that I do is without reason. That said, I ask a lot questions and I yearn for advice and the “how tos,” but sometimes when I tell you I do things “this way” it’s not because I want your approval or disapproval, it’s because I’m including you in on something I’m excited about doing for my sweet girl. So for all you folks shaking your head at us moms, be careful not to do too much of that in front of us. We’re trying really hard to be the “perfect mom,” when you shoot down things we’re sure of or worked hard for it hurts our feelings. We’re tired and exhausted and slightly stressed all the time, while we love encouragement and tips and the occasional “maybe you shouldn’t do it that way, but try this,” what we really need is to hear that what were doing make sense. That we’re doing a good job. That even if fifteen years ago they didn’t do XYandZ , that it’s ok that we do it now. Sometimes we hear so much “You should do this” that it makes us feel like we are terrible parents. We rise up like proud lions when we figure things out on our own… when you refuse to agree or continue to force why your way is better it only makes our hearts more frustrated. So please, by all means tell us when we ask, offer advice even when we don’t – just don’t indulge in it. Don’t shoot down every little thing… by all means if it’s going to hurt my child hit me a top my head and push me out of the way. But overall – do equally build us up through encouragement also.
Any other momma’s out there struggle with this?